I am growing

For a while now, I seem to have developed a certain obsession for mountains and the way they can be climbed, so I ended up reading a presentation by Brian Cavanaugh on Edmund Hillary and loved what he wrote:

“Sir Edmund Hillary was the first man to climb Mount Everest. On May 29, 1953 he scaled the highest mountain then known to man-29,000 feet straight up. He was knighted for his efforts.

The happy ending seemed to have easily obtained. However, until we read his book, High Adventure, we don’t understand that Hillary had to grow into this success.

You see, in 1952 he attempted to climb Mount Everest, but failed. A few weeks later a group in England asked him to address its members.

Hillary walked on stage to a thunderous applause. The audience was recognizing an attempt at greatness, but Edmund Hillary saw himself as a failure. He moved away from the microphone and walked to the edge of the platform.

He made a fist and pointed at a picture of the mountain. He said in a loud voice, “Mount Everest, you beat me the first time, but I’ll beat you the next time because you’ve grown all you are going to grow… but I’m still growing!”

I find strength in the thought that I was not born completely developed into the greatness of what I can be. I find comfort that not even the second time was I born completely developed into what I can be, and what I am to be has not yet been shown. I don’t even know myself what I am capable of. But I know I can grow. And if I come across something higher than me, I am the daughter of The Most High and I can grow high and above my circumstances. My mountains have not yet found out how high I can grow. I don’t fully understand it myself yet, but I am eager to find out.

There is a quote by an unknown author, which says that if you want to see the rainbow you must put up with a little rain first. I truly believe that if we are ready to get wet by the rain we will also have the blessing of seeing the rainbow with our own eyes. I believe that climbing a mountain 29,000 feet high begins with a first step, because you never just find yourself on the top. I believe it takes a lot of stubbornness not to give up even if you would find yourself slipping back to the valley for the hundredth thousand time. I don’t believe the human mind is able to fully perceive what Adonai put inside those who believed in Yeshua’s sacrifice. I believe the same power that raised Him from the dead lives in me and such strength can only grow, not to lift me up or to fulfill my needs, but for His sake.

For His sake to climb my mountains the same way He walked my valleys. Perhaps it sounds crazy and impossible, but it is in now way crazier than Holiness itself scooping down in my dirt to pick me up from there.

I believe with all my heart we were not saved solely to have a chair reserved in a church or another. But we were saved to grow in the likeness of the One who saved us, and with the same strength and trust to build up His Kingdom, not only to follow our personal goals and needs. If we are not growing, we’re not stagnant but we are going down. And it is of no use to us to just believe if we don’t conquer any ground in our lives. A buried gift is of no use to the One who gave it to me. Because He gave me that gift in complete trust that He made me in His likeness, built from something capable of growth and to bring light. No one lights a candle only hide it away, but one puts a candle somewhere where it can light the whole house. Mountains come along on our paths in order to lift our light higher, not to crush us with their immensity.

To the one who will overcome He will give the crown of life. Not to the ones who will overcome sleep during lengthy and boring sermons. Not to the ones who will manage to stand up until the end of a song or a prayer. No! To the ones who will overcome shame and unworthiness and will not give up climbing and getting closer to The Holy One. To the ones who will overcome all the things that tempt them to mediocrity and will stand up for their King, and for His sake will help others to climb also.

Even if you fell down more than you can count, I know that I know that I know that every fall is necessary to teach you where not to put your foot again or what corner or rock to no longer grab in your climb. Adonai has no benefit if you just sit there fallen and feeling guilty! He has no benefit from you feeling sorry and staying away from Him in shame! Stand up, shake the dust off your clothes and try again, because all He wants is to see you grow. We owe Him at least this: to stand up after we fall, not to marinate in tears of guilt. I am not the center of His Kingdom, the "I" who sometimes succeeds sometimes not. He is the center of His Kingdom, and it is Him who can knight you and me for climbing the highest mountains there are.

Bat Melech בת מלך

Cristina כריסטינה

Translated by Emma